When fluffy, bubble gum movie star Megan Valentine suddenly finds herself broke and humiliated in the public eye, she wanders from the wreckage of a car accident and witlessly enlists in the U.S. Army hoping in vain that it will change her life.
Barney Ross leads a band of highly skilled mercenaries including knife enthusiast Lee Christmas, a martial arts expert, heavy weapons specialist, demolitionist, and a loose-cannon sniper. When the group is commissioned by the mysterious Mr. Church to assassinate the dictator of a small South American island, Barney and Lee visit the remote locale to scout out their opposition and discover the true nature of the conflict engulfing the city.
Arthur Bishop is a ‘mechanic’ – an elite assassin with a strict code and unique talent for cleanly eliminating targets. It’s a job that requires professional perfection and total detachment, and Bishop is the best in the business. But when he is ordered to take out his mentor and close friend Harry, Bishop is anything but detached.
Terrence McDonagh, a New Orleans Police sergeant, who starts out as a good cop, receiving a medal and a promotion to lieutenant for heroism during Hurricane Katrina. During his heroic act, McDonagh injures his back and later becomes addicted to prescription pain medication. McDonagh finds himself involved with a drug dealer who is suspected of murdering a family of African immigrants.
Dispatched from his basement room on an errand for his mother, slacker Jeff might discover his destiny (finally) when he spends the day with his brother as he tracks his possibly adulterous wife.
On a hot summer afternoon in the sleepy town of Blackwater Louisiana, a meteor streaks across the sky and crashes through the roof of the local Natural History Museum. The meteor is actually a spaceship containing an alien life form which animates the museum’s partially frozen Woolly Mammoth and begins a rampage. Local authorities and Government Investigators join forces with Frank Abernathy, the Museum Curator, and his father Simon, a B-Movie enthusiast, to bring down the giant mammoth in this alien-invasion flick!